My Pit of Despair

I have set the Lord always before me; Because He is at my right hand I shall not be moved. Therefore my heart is glad, and my glory rejoices; My flesh also will rest in hope. You will show me the path of life; In Your presence is fullness of joy; At Your right hand are pleasures forevermore. Psalm 16:8-9 & 11 NKJV

 I fell into a pit of despair. The combination of writers’ block and working from an outdated document pushed me over the edge. I started listening to the voices in my head that say, “You have nothing to offer anyone. Why are you doing this?”  I wallowed in the mire of self-doubt for hours.

Writing in that state of mind was futile. I couldn’t sit in front of my computer for one more minute. I retreated to my first and most important calling, to love the Lord my God with all my heart, soul, mind and strength. I cuddled up in the lap of the Lord with my journal. The entry ends with, “Help, Lord, help!!”

I am delighted to report that God did help me. He reached His hand down into the pit and pulled me out – again. God reminded me that He was the One who called me. Writing was His idea to begin with. God empowers me as I yield to His leading. All His encouragements over the years came flooding back. And so did my hope.

The devil is right; I don’t have anything of value to offer. But God does. God has all the wisdom and resources of heaven to offer. And He chose me to partner with Him.

At the bottom of my pit, I instinctively applied the wisdom of Psalm 16. I set the Lord before my eyes. He brought gladness to my soul and joy to my spirit. I can rest in hope again because He has shown me the path of life. In God’s presence is fullness of joy.

If you are in a pit of despair, then set Jesus before your eyes. Stay in His presence until you find the path of life. Then you will walk in joy and hope.